Dear all people with a heart,
Hutch needs your help immediately! We have a major issue at hand; we aren’t proud of it. The thing we are doing are probably illegal, and if not they should be. What’s the issue you ask? The caf! It’s gotta be some form of torture to eat there 3 times a day everyday! Have you seen what is served there? Yesterday was a dry quarter of a hamburger with a hard tear-apart slice of cheese, rocks for veggies, and plato potatoes with water gravy. They even ruin the breakfast; how do you ruin breakfast? Wet scrambled eggs, soft bacon, crispy (burnt) sausage, chewy French toast with syrup that apparently evaporates because theres never any left! Seriously, how do you ruin breakfast? i can’t eat cereal everyday; as if that was an option. Sour milk and stale cereal are always a great way to start the day. How can i forget, every meal comes with a side of flies…
So please people, have a heart and donate to the FeedAMe program. For only $0.50/week, you can feed a starving JB, assist a hungry college student continue to be productive, and feed a malnourished college athlete.
Thank you for your time.